Dead Squirrel

We have been having some beautiful weather here where we live.  It feels like spring.  These days have come after a particularly chilly stint, so we are excited, ready to open all the windows and play in the fresh air outside. 

This afternoon, while I was picking up dog poop surveying the beauty of our backyard, I almost stepped on a dead squirrel.  I cannot tell you how uncomfortable I was with this finding.  I do not like dead things.  I wasn't 100% sure it was dead.  It was just laying there in the middle of the backyard.  My children had not seen it yet.  The dog had.  I did what any sensible person would do and threw a plastic bucket on top of it. 

Discomfort.  I had not planned on spending the afternoon in the backyard, but did plan on letting my children run around there for most of that time.  I was not going to get away with the plastic bucket in the middle of the yard.  I needed to deal with this before I went inside.  There would be questions.  I did not want to frighten them in case they decided to kick the bucket (!).  The dog was starting to dig around it.  Ugh. 

I facebooked about what to do gathered my courage and got a shovel.  I had to tell the boys what I was doing.  They were going to see it.  I did not want to scare them.  Scootle immediately started with I want to see it!  I want to see it!  I had spoken too soon because I still did not have the guts to pick up the bucket.  I want to see it!  What if it wasn't dead and it jumped out at me when I lifted the bucket?  What if it was injured and I had to DO SOMETHING?  Why was my husband not coming home for another three hours?  I want to see it!  I could not bury the thing because our dog would just dig it right back up.

Friends on facebook and whatever inner wisdom I conjured up helped me to stop and seize moment.  I told the boys what I was going to do.  I used a shovel to gently lift the bucket and pick up Mr. Squirrel.  I sat him down outside our fence so the boys could still look at it, but not touch it and the dog could not get to it. 

Boo-boo:  Mommy, he will wake up one day?  No sweetie.
I asked Scootle how he felt seeing a dead squirrel:  Not good.  It makes me sad.  

We just sat there and looked for a while.  Boo got distracted.  Scootle wanted to drop a stick on Mr. Squirrel to see what happened.   I asked if he instead wanted to put the stick and other beautiful things he found in the yard there to honor the life of Mr. Squirrel.  We talked about how a life is something special, something we honor and give thanks for. 

He seemed relieved to have something to do, some way to deal with the confusing thoughts he was having.  We made a little memorial.  We said a prayer.   I was very grateful to have let go of my discomfort for my children's sake and my own.